1 tossed salad....please.

Instant Message from:

Austria is awesome: Hey sexy! How are you? I still can't get that amazing blow job out of my mind. Do you miss me?

Jez: Who is this?

I wish I could report that this kind of conversation is unique, but alas I'm a cocksucking whore and it seems to be happening a lot. But you knew that already ...right? Right.

Lately I've been getting a wholelotta internet action, but nothing in the real world. Which, whatever, I girl needs to take a break sometimes...

Anyways, I have a date this Friday with this writer guy from Chicago who seems pretty crazy, fun and cool...with a wholebuncha tats to prove it. I ain't never been with a man who has tats before. He looks like a total badass hottie...which is exactly what I need right now. However, I'm going to be in the middle of my you-know-what by Friday I ain't never gonna be the girl who gives up the goods without anything in return, understand? So action of a below the belt nature is out...but a little snog is always a fun time. I'm a little apprehensive with this one because he's always telling me how beautiful I am and bladity blah...not that I don't think I'm attractive, it just puts a lot of pressure on me to bring out my A-game. I'm still not sure if I should go curly or straight....it may seem like a simple decision, but it will totally dictate my outfit and my mood for the night depending on which way I decide to go. Did I lose you already?

It's pissing rain.

But I don't mind.

I like getting wet.

P.S. I just realised that the title was chosen with a completely different topic in mind...maybe next time then?